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快乐由你决定ASimpleTruthaboutHappiness
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佚名Anonymous
Iarticularlyhappydlikemostteenagers，Ireveledinmyangst.Oneday，however，itoethatIwastakingtheeasywayout.Anyonecouldbeunhappy;ittoeoreffort.Truegelayinstrugglingtobehappy.
&hatwehavetoinessesasomanypeople.Weassumeit'safeelingthatesasaresultofgoodthingsthatjusthappentous，thingsoverwhichwehavelittleornotrol.
Buttheoppositeistrue:happinessislargelyunderourtrol.Itisabattletobewagedandobea>
Toachieveahappierlife，it'sooverblingblocks，threeof>
parisonwithOthers
Mostofuspareourselveswithahinkishappier—arelative，anaeonewebarelyknow.Ioayoungmanwhostruckmeasparticularlysucdhappy.Hespokeofhisloveforhisbeautifulwifeaers，andofhisjoyatbeingaradiotalk-showhostinacityheloved.Irememberthinkingthathewasohoselueverythilesslyright.
&artedtalkingabouttheI.Heblesseditsexisteoldme，becausehecouldlookupinformationonmultiplesclerosis—theterriblediseaseafflighiswife.Ifeltlikeafnothinguedinhislife.
ImagesofPerfe
Almostanyofushaveimagesofhowlifeshouldbe.Theproblem，ofcourse，isthatonlyrarelydopeople'sjobs，spousesandliveuptotheseimaginedideals.
Here'sapersonalexample:Nooneinmyfamilyhadeverdivorced.Iassumedthatmarriagewasforlife.SowhenmywifeandIdivorcedthreeyearsafterthebirthofourson，myworld.Iwasafailureinmyowneyes.
Ilaterremarriedbutfidedtomywife，FranthatI'tshakethefeelingthatmyfamilylifehadfailed.Sheaskedmeithourfamilynow（whicludedherdaughterfromaprevieandmyson）.Ihadtoadmitthat，asidefromthepaihmysononlyhalfthetime（myex-wifeaody），ourfamilylifewaswonderful.
"Thenwhydon'tyoucelebrateit?"sheasked.
That'swhatIdecidedtodo.ButfirstIhadtogetridoftheimageofa"perfeily.
"Missi;Syndrome
&ivewayofsabotagiolookatsomethiedoflaw.It'slikelookingupatatireddtratingonthespacewhereoileismissing.Asabaldma;Wheeraroom，allIseeishair."
I'vespeudyinghappiness，ahemostsignifisI'vedrawnisthis:thereislittlecorrelatiohecesofpeople'slivesandhoytheyare.Amoment'srefleakethisobvious.eoplewhohavehadarelativelyeasylifeyetareessentiallyunhappy.Andhohavesufferedagreatdealbutgenerallyremainhappy.
&secretisgratitude.Allhappyperateful.Ungratefulpeopleotbehappy.Wetendtothinkthatbeingunhappyleadspeopletoplain，butit'struertosaythatplaiopeoplebeingunhappy.
Thesedsecretisrealizingthathappinessisaby-produethihemostobvioussourcesarethosepursuitsthatgiveourlivespurpose—anythingfromstudyioplayihemorepassiohemorehappinesswe'relikelytoexperience.
Fihatsomethiransdsusandthatourexistenelargermeaninghelpusbehappier.iritualiousfaith，oraphilosophyoflife.Yourphilosophyshouldenpassthistruism:ifyouchoosetofiiveinvirtuallyeverysituation，youwillbeblessed，andifyouchoosetofindtheawful，youwillbecursed.Asihisislargelyyourdeake.
我以前并不是一个非常快乐的孩子，像大多数十几岁的孩子一样，我总是沉浸在自己的烦恼中。
但是，有一天，我豁然开朗：谁都有可能不快乐，那不需要任何勇气或努力，真正的挑战就在于，你努力想使自己快乐。
也许很多人都未曾听说过，快乐也要付出努力。
我们通常认为，当我们很难控制或无法控制的好事降临时，快乐才随之而来。
然而，事实刚好相反：在很大程度上，我们自己控制着快乐。
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